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A New York Escorts Confessions

Etymologically Correct

Scrotum scrotum scrotum scrotum scrotum scrotum. Vagina vagina vagina vagina vagina vagina. Scrotum vagina scrotum vagina scrotum scrotum scrotum.

America, what the hell is up your butt?

First there was the controversy over author Susan Patron’s The Higher Power of Lucky which won the Newberry, the most prestigious honor in children’s literature. Only it made the mistake of using the word “scrotum”. In referring to a dog. Who had gotten bitten by a rattlesnake.

There was nothing sexual in its context. And yet, a whole bunch of librarians and parents freaked out.

“Some parts of the body are evil and should not be acknowledged. We should be thankful for the Christian librarians who show us the righteous path.”

“As a father of a daughter, I am thankful that this is being discussed. Maybe there should be separate shelf in the library where particular books that have questionable content are shelved or maybe some sticker that would alert a parent that there is something in this book that needs to be reviewed beforehand.”

Then there was the latest brouhaha over what the Atlantic Theatre in Atlantic Beach, Florida had once called The Hoohah Monologues when a complaining motorist objected to its sign. That would of course be The Vagina Monologues. This time three students in Cross River, New York were initially suspended when they dared to read a passage from the play at an an event sponsored by the school literary magazine.

Remember when writing things like tits and ass on the bathroom wall was the thing that was bad?

We all know we come from Puritan roots in this country. But still it never ceases to amaze me how much people get their panties in a snit when actual biological words are used. What are we so afraid of? How far would a little actual knowledge take us?

Maybe if We The People learned to say “scrotum” and “vagina” aloud we wouldn’t have priests abusing little boys on the sly. Maybe there wouldn’t be as many teen pregnancies. Maybe there’d be no rape.

At the very least maybe I wouldn’t have to listen to the kind of conversation I overheard at a cafe recently:
“Well what do you call it then? In front of Josie?”

“We say “poop” and “sissy”.

“‘Sissy’? You say “sissy”?

“That’s weird. Most parents say “pee” or “pee pee”. Although I’ve heard “wee” and “wee wee” too.”

I don’t know. In my house we called a BM a BM.

But that’s just me.

Comments

I should point out, however, that if America weren't so hung up about sex, you might find yourself out of a job. Or at least with a somewhat reduced booking schedule...

Posted by Gadfly on Mar 13 09:54AM

AbandonedStuff.com has posted about this previously, and challenges people to also write about it.

Posted by Ashley on Mar 13 03:12PM

i agree we're pretty uptight. i just finished a recent series of nudes. i bust my ass using charcoal to cover a piece of paper the size of a bedspread and you know what i hear in the studio?

"did your wife mind that you were drawing all these naked women?"

year and a half of my life spent and this is your first fucking question about my work?

Posted by al on Mar 14 09:40PM

i agree we're pretty uptight. i just finished a recent series of nudes. i bust my ass using charcoal to cover a piece of paper the size of a bedspread and you know what i hear in the studio?

"did your wife mind that you were drawing all these naked women?"

year and a half of my life spent and this is your first fucking question about my work?

Posted by al on Mar 14 09:42PM

Interesting story. I happen to agree that we all need to relax or so called standards on what is correct in referring to our 'private' parts. Vagina and scrotum are not in the least offensive and I find no problems in saying them and don't think that my children should either.

As we grow older we should learn to speak like we are adults right? We should also learn to act like ones to. I think that is what we have all forgotten in all of our 'puritan' ways.

Talking about sex and what is involved is not what is wrong with our country, it is not talking about it that is ripping it apart.

Just my thoughts.
JennyB

Posted by Jenny on Mar 22 12:03PM

Personally, I'm guessing it was based in mysogyny, not just erotiphobia. According to the Today show, another student read the word "fuck" at the same reading, without challenge. The passage they read says: "My short skirt is a liberation flag in the women’s army. I declare these streets, any streets, my vagina’s country.„ That's way more upsetting to some people than just the word "Vagina".

Personally, I think the girls should have complied with the principle and left the word out. With the correct enunciation, it's even more effective to say "I declare these streets my count...try". :p

Posted by shadowplay on Mar 23 03:16PM

Yes! I wrote a very similar post on my blog. I agree. Completely ridiculous.

But what, may I ask, is BM?

Posted by Beewriter on Apr 7 06:51PM

Australia is not puritanically hung up on sex or simple anatomical words, and I make plenty of money, also it's almost completely legal all over the country here. I'm in Queensland which is the top right hand corner of Oz and work as a 'sole operator'. I can claim all work expenses (rent, mobile, condoms/lubricant, lingerie, toys etc) on my tax. Plus there's legal brothels all over the state. Only trouble in my view is the anti-smoking laws are pretty fierce and they no longer serve alcohol (or any drinks at all) in brothels anymore. Unfortunately, since they changed the law (back) to allow brothels, they haven't agreed to escort agencies, nor escorts from the brothels. Not that agencies don't exist, but with so many legal ways to work, why would you want to get busted? Plus, you can still outcall as a sole operator. Anyway, Sydney and Melbourne it's different, agencies and brothels are legal down there. All working girls earn an excellent living in this industry in Australia, and very few bother walking the streets anymore.
Forgive me if I am uneducated, but I have the idea that the only place in America where it's legal to work is some counties in Nevada. That's fucking crazy. How do you guarantee the safety of girls/guys in the industry if you don't provide them with safe working environments?

Posted by Michelle on Nov 12 08:16AM

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