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A New York Escorts Confessions
5767
I wanted to be quiet.
I blurted it all out to you. The anger, the hurt, the pain at being dropped by M well before he should have had the power to do so. And then after being so very out with my emotions, I needed to curl up and be small.
I thought about it. Why was I so upset? Why had he affected me the way he did? I made myself go inside of it even though I didn’t want to.
And I knew what it was, of course I did. M had a quality that all the people I have ever loved had. He was magic. He lived by his passion, was made of them—they formed the core of his being. People like him are electric, addictive. You want to get inside of them, see what they see, feel what they feel, experience life from that kind of height.
And then I thought about that analysis. “People.” “People like him.” Meaning there’s more than one. Right?
Woody Allen supposedly once said that, “All New Yorkers are Jewish.” I think he was thinking of bagels and words like “schmuck” and “schlep” that have worked their way into our collective vernacular. But on Monday for Yom Kippur, I took that statement one step further. The day before I had been nursing my troubles over a soy latte when I overheard a conversation between two women who were going to be observing the holiday. Even though I’m not Jewish, there was something about their commitment to starting anew with the new year that really struck me. I decided to fast the next day, just as they would. And during all those ensuing woozy hours, I thought about what the last year had brought and how I could do better, be better, in the year to come. Then at sunset, I kissed the year—let’s see if I get this right—5766—goodbye, and made a move to move on.
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confessionsComments
I figured you needed time for yourself after that post about M. Didn't know it affected you that deeply. Hope you are okay now. You're too happy to be sad because that's not you. Glad you're able to see pass M and move on. We want our happy Alexa back! Thanks. :)
Posted by Pete from Cal on Oct 6 07:32PMPost a Comment

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about me
So why am I writing this blog? I have an inner exhibitionist that just needs to be let out. I've always wanted to bare myself completely in front of strangers but have always been held back by fear.
As strange as it may sound, I've never really truly bared myself in front of any of my clients. For all that they've seen, they've never seen me be me. And for all that I've seen, I simply need to share it with you!
So why should you come? To be tantalized and teased. To get release by knowing the true me.
I promise that I won't bite, and if I do bite, I'll make sure you like it!
my favorite posts
- Caveat Vendor - Part II
- Selling Out (Part III)
- Poops!... I Did It Again!
- My First Escorting Experience
- My First Lesbian Experience
- Daddy's Little Girl (Part II)
- Selling Out (Part III)


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good to have you back . xoxo
Posted by hard jj on Oct 5 10:36PM