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A New York Escorts Confessions

Traffic Accident

You know when you do something so embarrassing but so funny at the same time? You wonder whether or not you should actually tell anyone about it, because you know for a fact that everyone will laugh, but you also know for a fact they will be laughing at you not with you.

Well something like that happened…um…to a close friend of mine.

She was visiting LA and she was going from South Pasadena to Santa Monica. Or trying to. She knew she had to get from the 101 South to the 10 West. But somehow she accidentally got on the 5. She went a few exits, then managed to get off the highway and turn around. She saw arrows for the 101 South and got back on that highway instead. When she went to look for the 10 West though, she couldn’t find it anywhere. It suddenly occurred to her that she must have gotten back on the 101 after the 10 exit. So she doubled back again. And finally ended up on the 10 West—in a heap of traffic.

By this time, forty-five minutes had already passed. My friend realized she kinda sort of had to go to the bathroom. Desperately. As the traffic inched along, she wondered what to do. Should she get off the highway and try to find a place to pee? What if she veered onto another wrong highway again? Should she call someone and ask them which exit to get off of in case of emergency? Surely she could make it. She would just push her legs together like a yoga exercise and try to think about something else.

That tactic worked for about twenty minutes and three exits. My friend began to despair. She looked at the empty thirty-six-ounce water bottle lying on the floor and cursed it. Damn it! Why did it have to be so hot anyhow? How could you be thirsty and have to pee at the same time? Surely the body could somehow recycle the fluid she needed? Couldn’t someone come up with a mechanism to do just that—internally of course?

She looked at the bottle again. She began to wonder if there was any way to release herself into it? Cleanly? While still alternating with the brake and the gas pedal? Probably it wasn’t that good of a plan.

But the beach towel in the back seat on the other hand…

My friend grabbed said towel and piled it into as many layers as she could underneath her. She looked quickly in her side mirror and rear view, then thrust up her skirt and down her panties. And then, while simultaneously driving at a comfortable three miles an hour, my friend relieved herself long and good and with perfect aim into her best friend’s borrowed beach towel.

If you see a wet towel in a trash can near Yoga Works on Main Street, I wouldn’t use it if I were you…

Comments

Pretty resourceful, if you ask me. And hey, it coulda been worse, eh?

Posted by Charlie Girl on Aug 1 04:27AM

Yeah, how 'bout that L.A. traffic. It's something else. Not like in New York where there's always an alley you can relieve yourself in... ;-)

Posted by Stan on Aug 1 04:03PM

Knowing my favorite writer, the famous Alexa, is in LA and I can't meet her just kills me. She could be the hottie who drove next to me when I came to work this morning or one of the beautiful women I checked out at Starbucks this afternoon. Alexa is among us, the Angelinos! Wow!! :) This story about your "friend" really had me bursting with laughers. I wonder if other drivers next to your "friend" had any ideas. Or maybe they were all peeing in their cars too. :D The City of Angels is blessed having you! Hahah.. :) Take care.

Posted by Pete from Cal on Aug 1 07:22PM

It's amazing we ever have sex with your gender after hearing stories like that. Because when you aren't pissing yourselves in cars you generally smell nice and are clean shaven. I am just saying.

Posted by Cash on Aug 2 01:37AM

Pretty smart way to solve the problem !

http://membres.lycos.fr/indriescorte/

Posted by indri on Aug 18 04:37AM

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I'm a twenty-something New York escort. I love Prada, Seven jeans, and Jimmy Choos. I'm also totally addicted to Starbucks' grande non-fat white mocha and working out.

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