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A New York Escorts Confessions
My Tale of—Whoa!
Envelopes can be scary things, can’t they? Stationary that’s penned in a hand you hoped to never see again, a letter from the IRS, a scrawled missive from your landlord—
A jury summons.
Drat! Double Drat!
On closer inspection though, it turns out it’s a juror qualification questionnaire, NOT a summons.
Phew. But still…
I actually sat on a jury right when I came to New York. Frankly, I was surprised the lawyers picked me. It was a grand larceny case. A young woman had been attacked coming out of one of the Harlem subway stops and her gold chain was ripped off of her neck. The attorneys questioned each of us perspectives and asked us if we’d ever experienced anything similar.
OK, yuck. I thought back to the time I was sexually assaulted on the Paris Metro. When it came to be my turn, I tried to pull back on the details a bit since I didn’t want to well, make anyone in the courtroom vomit. Clearly though my tale of woe now lacked the crucial details to get me released. Shit. I always did find a way to overcompensate.
The case was a single witness case, which means only the victim saw her attacker and identified him fifteen minutes later. The chain was never found. Lest you think this was no big deal, the victim was traumatized enough to move from New York a month after it happened. And when she took the stand, it was the first time in a year she had been back.
The potential perp turned out to be an African-American man who was exactly my age. I mean his birthday was the same day AND the same year. I couldn’t help staring at him and feeling some weird sort of kinship. He was so young! What would happen to him if he was convicted? Could he really have done it? He looked so like a regular guy.
Uch. One witness case. African-American accused. All I kept thinking of was the statistics. Another black man sent to prison. How was the prosecutor going to provide enough evidence to convince me either way? I didn’t want to be part of our messed up system.
Race does really have a way of raising its angry head in these kind of environments I’ll tell you. There were two African-Americans on the jury. One of them actually worked at a police station in Harlem, though not in the precinct where the crime took place. She was resolute that this guy was not guilty. When other jurists tried to press her, though, she wouldn’t provide a reason. In fact she was downright hostile, and looked at all of us—except the other African-American man—like we were accusing her of something.
We were sequestered for four hours. We asked the judge if we could be read the definition for reasonable doubt. And ultimately, we convicted the guy.
As soon as he heard the verdict he began to softly cry. I watched a single tear make its way from the corner of his eye, down the stubble of his cheek to his sweater vest. My stomach and jaw clenched. I felt hot and awful.
And that wasn’t the worst part.
Because afterwards the judge, who was an absolute peach by the way, took us into his quarters. The guy’s prior record had not been introduced as evidence, so the judge took the opportunity to read it aloud for us. Our sweet-faced potential perp? In the short span of his life, he had already been convicted of grand larceny three other times.
Say sayanora sweetheart.
No, the worst part of the case happened midway through our sequestering, when I had to go to the ladies. There was a small bathroom within the jury room and I went to make use of it just as they were bringing us lunch. I squatted over the toilet, hiked my skirt up and pulled my tights and thong down to my mid-calf. While I was peeing, I thought about the case, about our powers of memory, about all of the cases where witnesses’ recollections were later shown to be faulty. I thought about what details I remembered during tragic or unexpected circumstances. And that’s when Juror #4, opened the door on me and flashed me to juror #6, #9—and #11.
I ask you, where oh where is the justice in that?!
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confessionsComments
I've never been on a jury. I've been called lots of times for duty, but when they put me in the box, the lawyers look at me and throw me out. I don't really understand it. I just with the summons had a box I could check for 'You guys never want me anyway, so let's not waste our time.'.
Posted by Stan on Dec 7 06:50PMHey Alexa. Is your questionnaire for the city, state, or federal? If federal, then you run a very good chance to not get picked...
If you come to the federal court, look me up...
Posted by Ernie on Dec 7 07:04PMI just got a thing in the mail from the county court system. I had to fill something out for them to see if i was available for jury duty. I wonder what would have happened if I didnt fill it out?
Posted by G-Man on Dec 7 07:15PMI was foreman of a grand jury once on a 1st degree murder charge. I was in my office on the courthouse square when a sheriff deputy appeared at my door. Said the judge had requested my presence - they were short one juror. We billed her. Hmmm . . . might make a good beginning for a short story.
Who knows how well this system really works?
Posted by Roberto on Dec 7 10:32PMif only i was juror #4....or 6, or 9...or 11 even (hehe) funny stuff alexa
Posted by xman on Dec 8 01:55AMIf you don't want to serve on a jury, here's an almost guaranteed way to get challenged. It won't get you out of appearing for voir dire (jury examination) but it will probably keep you off any juries.
When the judge asks you "Can you find someone guilty of breaking a law you don't believe is right?" just say, "Of course not."
They may bluster and threaten you, but they can't do anything about it. And neither side will want you on the jury, nor will the judge. If you want to know why this works, Google "jury nullification."
M
Posted by StMarc on Dec 8 10:48AMi went once to jury summons, but didn't get picked.. the jury was selected before they even called my name.. so lucky me didn't have to go thru it..
but usually for the summons i put that i can't make it due to no transportation.. and that works for me..
Posted by thedivaofthedark on Dec 8 04:56PMJustice is only served by those willing to serve justice......it is our foundation for our legal system.......as far as your question, it really should be, "I ask you, where oh where is the lock on the door?!"
Posted by Rex on Dec 9 08:25AMYou had better hope they don't call you for GRAND jury duty Alexa. I got one of those questionaires and sure enough I got called for grand jury duty. Now here's the kicker...if you get called for this and they are empanelling 2 week juries AND they ask for volunteers THEN GIVE THEM YOUR DAMN CARD!!! If you don't picked for a jury your name goes back into the juror rolls and you WILL be called again and the next time it could be for a month, three month, six month or a YEAR of grand jury duty.
I served my 2 weeks gladly and got it over with.
Posted by Brian, the 646 Guy on Dec 25 01:57PMPost a Comment

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So why am I writing this blog? I have an inner exhibitionist that just needs to be let out. I've always wanted to bare myself completely in front of strangers but have always been held back by fear.
As strange as it may sound, I've never really truly bared myself in front of any of my clients. For all that they've seen, they've never seen me be me. And for all that I've seen, I simply need to share it with you!
So why should you come? To be tantalized and teased. To get release by knowing the true me.
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There's a debate going on in the UK at the moment about whether jurors should be told about a defendant's "previous". On the one hand I do passionately believe in "innocent until proven guilty". But take, say sex offenders, particularly where the victim is a minor. In a one witness crime such as that, should the jury be swayed by a previous propensity to offend? My gut says yes, but my mind still wavers.
Posted by Alex on Dec 7 11:37AM