Was his name Sang?

I'm all for fetishes but some people are just way too far out there. I don't blame you for walking out. That's just nasty!

At least he didnt ask for a teabag or a blumper... heh...

Two comments on "showers": I was repairing a surgeon's computer at a paediatric hospital some years ago and what flashes up on his web browser? An image of the "brown" version... Yike.

Secondly, I guess you only poop by accident, eh? (He says remembering your Indian dining experience...)

Wait! What about a rice pudding shower? Mmmmmmm. Pudding.

:-)

My Goodness I remember reading about that sort of shit (excuse pun) from books dated way back hundreds of years ago, I can't believe some men actually still want that. Does it really turn them on?? Who passes on that information or is it inbuilt when they're born.

I find your site fascinating, but I have debated with myself, unconvincingly, whether you are a real escort or not. Tonight I think the debate may have reached a tipping point. Correct me if I'm wrong in thinking that your post implies that before this particular client you had no or little knowledge of what brown and golden showers are, and that a client had never asked you for one before. There is no way, in my view, that an experienced escort with several years of at least weekly but probably daily sessions with "clients" could have come this far without knowing what a golden or brown shower is or without having been asked for one by a client.

Please don't interpret my doubts about your veracity as criticism of you or your writing. If you are not a real escort, I think you've pulled off a remarkably successful gag that has given birth to some funny and insightful writing, and the gag has certainly done no one any harm that I can see. If you *are* a real escort, I'd be happy to hear any arguments that you have that might change my mind.

i dunno. i've known some adults in their fifties who didn't know what golden showers are. and even if our alexa's profession is indeed being an escort, it is entirely conceivable that the clientel she attends to simply never request such acts and therefore she was unfamiliar with the practice.

watching a girl piss can be entertaining. having a girl piss on you, not as much.

ok i need to barf.

wes, thanks for your comment. you're right. it is funny that no one asked me for a golden shower/brown shower in the last couple years. go figure.

you know, i never really expected my blog to get this much attention when i started writing!

other people have emailed me and asked whether i'm for real also. i can assure you, i am. although... it's sort of fun to be the center of this kind of mysterious speculation. :)

Yeah, I don't think she'd get as many requests for more kinky stuff going through her networks. Maybe if she was walking the streets in day-glo, thigh-high purple latex boots or something.

I think I could take a piss on someone if the money was right, but there is no way I could shit in someone's mouth. That's just... weird. What if the consistency was all wrong?!

You NEED to read a book called Fanny by Erica Jong. She goes through the same lucky invitations ;)

ew

Golden showers. Brown showers. I need a shower, of the H2O variety. Here's two more terms to look up: Cleveland Steamer, Dirty Sanchez. Forewarned is forearmed.

Oh geez, I keep my poop to myself, it's a very personal thing, and I only feel comfortable doing it alone or in front of my beagle.

That being said, I can FATHOM someone wanting to have it done ON them. But IN THEIR MOUTH!?! That's FOUL. Not even the beagle eats poop.

Eww..eww..eww..eww..
Doesn't matter to me if you are an escort or not, love your blog Alexa.

I would think that eating shit would make you very sick.... not nauseous but honest to God emergency room sick.
As far as the golden shower thing, under the right circumstance, it might not be that horrible of an act. If it was the right person, in the shower, and not on my face.. maybe in the right position but certainly not my cup of tea.

Alexa, I have only been reading your blog for three weeks or so but I have read all the previous posts. If you have the chance, I would like for you to answer a question, if you don't mind. What exactly is the difference between an escort and a prostitute? I can hire an "expensive" prostitute in Vegas to spend the evening drinking and gambling without sex if I want. Does that make them an escort for the night?
It also seems to me that you hold the majority of your clients in a negative light. I'll bet, most of the guys you "work with" aren't so horrible that they can only get sex from a escort. Do you thinnk poorly of them for using you as an escort?
It's hard for me to verbalize but there is a raw honesty from paying for an escort. I consider what you do an honorable profession. Much more honorable then mine. Like the old saying goes something like," You pay for it anyway. One way or another." So anyway, keep up the good work and reading your blog always adds a twinkle to my day.

WOW - I've actually heard a lot about golden and brown showers, but in his MOUTH?! That's REALLY disturbing. I mean, if a guy wants that he should have to forewarn you so that you can load up on beans or coffee or something. What a shithead (pun intended).

Well, I started reading your blog a short while ago after stumbling into it from another one...and I'm hooked. Especially after this entry. ;) Golden shower I've heard of, but brown???

I heard tales of this sort of thing happening in the Phillipines when I was a Marine. the twist there was the guy held up a clear plate.. and the girl placed her butt on it and took a dump. I think they called it Plating,, it sounded gross then.... it sounds gross now.

All I know is, is that if Dan Savage is against it, I sure as hell am.

This reminds me of a story concerning the bugbear of my life, otherwise known as Witch No 1. When I once remarked to a collegue that I spoke to her a lot, he said "Have you got a thing about her?" I said no but he went on to warn me off of her (I wish I'd listened to him now) and he said that she had pictures of people with s**t in their mouths on her computer. This I now find funny as she gets very shirty at the slightest mention of anything so "pervy".

Dawei

"I think I could take a piss on someone if the money was right, but there is no way I could shit in someone's mouth. That's just... weird. What if the consistency was all wrong?!"

All wrong for who? Do you really think someone who wants you to shit in their mouth is gonna complain about consistency? And if you're shiting in their mouth, what do you care what the consistency is?

Do you get to/have to use their tounge for t.p.?

Do you get to/have to use their tounge for t.p.?

Well, that part sounds kinda fun (if you ignore the fact that they are wiping shit from your asshole).

Re: the consistency, I would just be a bit worried. I mean, clearly you guys have never witnessed a morning-after Thai meal. We are talking explosive diarrhoea. It would burn their face off!

Just reading this makes me want to puke. That's so left field, out of the blue...

Don't you need special escorts for that kind of shit, literally?

The British actress Sarah Miles is famous for drinking a glass of her own urine every morning (ewww)...she believes it has revitalising properties.
So maybe your client felt like ordering out for a change...lol

A firm believer in "things always happen when they need to" I never thuoght I'd be reading this as a way to divert my cravings for large quanities of chocolate. So, um... thanks it worked like a charm.

Sure does bring new meaning to the workplace hazards indeed.

:-)

So that's what Dick Cheney wanted after the debate?

Seriously, handcuffs are one thing... cumming on body parts, ok... but excretory activities? I have heard of this, but whatever happened to just trying to find funky positions? I guess you can call me conservative.

Enema of the state indeed.

Brown shower, hands down, is probably the only one sexual association that I am disgusted at so far.

Somebody got to get his shit right. Pun or no pun.

Man that is gross!

I always thought it was a Hot Karl, not a brown shower. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

So, out of curiousity, how many people visit your site every day?

imagine--had this client been a couple weeks early, you could have walked out of there relieved and with a huge bonus!!! and he could've had a brown shower vindaloo!!!

I had occasion a couple of years back to be driving through Nevada. I got off I-80 (can't remember the town anymore) and happened to pass a brothel. Being a single, lusty young fellow, I thought it was my duty to check out the goods. Anyway these folks had a "Pleasure Menu" printed up with a list of the available services. One of the services was called "The Wind, the Rain and the Lava". A little head scratching later I asked what in hell this could be; it turns out this item was very much what you described (added bonus was the Wind, I guess the girl farted at/on you before treating you to the (golden) Rain and the (brown) Lava.) I settled for some more mundane services...

oh EWEWEW. I just dont get it, v.un-sanitary.

that is just nasty! you did the right thing by walking out. I had not heard about this until i began to listen to howard stern about a year ago. There has been so much about deviant sex i have picked up from his show. there are some strange things out there--fetishes i guess

Alexa,
Did you ever read my blog post entitled "Fan mail from a lady of the evening"? I'm curious whether you have any thoughts on my remarks about consumerism.

You've gotta be pretty ignorant if you think this chick is the real deal. This is obviously a ruse to get into the world of publishing (online for now.) She's makin' this shit up as she goes (pun intended.)

Note to Biff re the Lava bit of the "Wind, Rain, Lava" - how could those women do it to order?!

I love the irony here.

"Are you real?"...meaning are you paid to act like you are sexually attracted to someone. In the context of this blog...NOT being real would be bad.

Meaning...acting as if you were acting like you were sexually attracted to someone would be bad...and it would even be worse if you got paid for acting as if you were getting paid for acting...

That's almost as funny as paying somebody to shit on them...hell, I get it all the time for free at work and bonuses when I get home.

Alexa, whatever you are, you are an entertaining young lady (at least in my sick little world) and a good writer. Keep up the good work and welcome to my blogroll.

Of all things, I'm most surprised tha so many of you have apprently never heard of scat. I'm not saying I go for it myself- I find it distasteful- but I've certainly heard of it and seen it. And I don't even lead a particularly wild life. I'm surprised, especially since I would think that anyone who has lived in New York long enough becomes rather intimate with many of the ideas of fetishism. While I woudln't care for it myself, I am rather confused on one point- he asked for you to deficate in him, not the oher way around. I can see how this might be disturbing, but on the other hand, it's not like he asked for you to swallow his. On the oher hand, it doesn't realy lend itself to a kiss goodnight. If you're really interested in this, look up the Till Eulenspiegle society here in the city- it's named after a famous german o the name who has many legendary stories of his encounters with feces. I don't really personally understand what gets people going with this stuff of course. I suppose you just have to have a taste for it.

You know, I'm firmly in the to each his own camp, but my question is how one figures they like this sort of thing in the first place. I can see how one might have a predeliction for say, red high heels: you see em you like em--they make you hard. OK, I'm on board. But how on earth do you come to realize that someone shitting in your mouth is what really floats your boat???????????

Scat is big in Germany and Japan, just ask Mrs Cartman.

"

"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

Wm. Shakespeare

Never doubt for a moment that there is nothing--and I mean NOTHING-- under the sun that some sick bastard won't fetishize.

Planet,

Re the "Wind, Rain and Lava" treatment.

I didn't really pursue the matter enough to find out how the girls got ready for this activity (sounded plenty messed up to me). My guess is you would have to set up this activity beforehand.

How cool would that be to walk in and have to say, "Yeah I'm the guy who called ahead to get sh*t on". No thanks!

I was with a beautiful and wonderful woman ... and it was getting good and serious to the degree that we communicated on how we could co-create a fully symbiotic life together.

One thing about her though ...

When taking a shower together, she would never ever pee! If she had to go, she stepped out, completely wet, sat on the toilet, peed, and then returned to our shower.

That always caused a big wide grin on my face, not to invalidate her, but because I saw the humour in it.

When I peed in the shower, she'd get upset whenever she caught me doing it. Later she'd get the clorox out and scrub the shower stall.

We did not stay together .... we eventually went our seperate ways.

As long as there was no peeing in the shower, she was a lot of fun, and very adventurous and exciting in the shower ... and a lot of fun on the kitchen table ... and on the couch and on the coffee table ... and yes of course, also good in the bed ... and good on the rest of the furniture too.

But the no peeing in the shower thing ... I just could never make myself step out of wet shower, and pee into the toilet, with subsequent return to the shower.

So she left ... and she took her clorox with her.

In one place I used to live, the public transportation wasn't by bus... it was by van. And what did the boldly display on the side of the vans? Nothing other than the abbreviation of their Public Transportation System.... SCATS.

I guess they didn't know.

You think that is bad? Wait until your girlfriend whom you have been dating for months and haven't gone passed petting as you to give her a golden shower. I will not go into what happened here.

As far as golden showers go, we use them frequently. I actually can ache for the feel of his piss on my cunt or in my mouth and running down my body. Scat though just isn't my cuppa tea. Holds no appeal for me. I am not surprised she hasn't been asked before, many of the escorts I know have never been asked for that either. Generally that comes with a person who looks for a more specialized type of escort in the BDSM field rather than the vanilla world. In my own personal opinion of course.

Golden shower & brown showers are in demand by clients.
I am a call girl & many of my clients(mostly aged men) pay good money to get brown shower.
They eat the complete thing.

I've heard of people showering with unfiltered CITY WATER! It comes via underground pipes, sometimes hundreds of years old, which have never been cleaned, and which are infested with vermin, insects, and their assorted droppings, not to mention the flaking rust.

Truly, someone could make a ton of money by specializing in doing things others won't. If you can get by the idea about what you're doing, if the other person wants it, why not, if it doesn't affect you physically?

In a way, it's tolerance of others' wants and needs.

i know this dude who has a serious poo fetish...so this isnt news to me, although it is gross.

Well i have a brown shower appointmnet in two days

brown & golden showers i do just love eating & drinking them from a dom type of a woman who demands & like giving them herself. and, right now, i'm waiting for my next big recycled meal. bill

I am a guy with this fetish. I will never attempt to act it out; But I will tell you this fetish is not the result of a normal life (At least for me). It comes out of childhood trauma and subsequent mental problems. Fortunately, other than this, I turned out to be a well adjusted individual.

Amazing how the diaries of a call girl by Belle de Jour seem to have inspired an army of "blogs" and of course they are real, and of course an escort would never have been asked for a golden shower... Which planet?

I have had two different slender and pretty escorts shit on me. It was fun!:) I potsed on our local escort review board that I was seeking a brown shower. She PM'ed me and said she's done it many times before and it is no big to do for her. She said she has guys who eat her shit. I mentioned I do not want to go that far, but I'd like for a girl to shit on my chest and then play with her shit.

We swapped cell phone #'s and I needed to be "on call" for when she was ready to go. Keep this in mind, a scat date NEEDS to have timing via cell phone, because girls can not just shit on demand. She may need to build up for a day or two and when she calls you, you need to get over to her place NOW!! :)

I was inexperienced at this, this slender and pretty blonde did it many times. What she did not tell me, is she took a laxative. I was hoping for a firm shit lot, her ass sputtered fart gasses and "chocolate syrup"!!:) It WAS a turn on as she squatted above me in her dry bath tub and shit on my chest. We were both naked of course. The first sence of reality in experiencing this, is that a womans shit smells!:) As lovely as she is and her body is, her shit smells like shit!:)

So here I was with her diaria shit all over my chest. I touched it a little and then we both took a shower and soaped up really good. We then resumed with a traditional type escort / John date which included BBBJ and doggie. It was a hot date and the kinkiness of it drew us closer together as friends who shared in this perverted fun activity.

I posted a review of this date, but the girl preferred her name to remain anonymous. She did give me permission to give her name and # to any guys who PM'ed me seeking a scat date. She did not want every one to know she is into shitting on guys though.

A couple months pass and I get a PM from another escort and she basically says "I would love to shit on you, PM me whenever you are in the mood for it. I gave her my cell # and the next day she called me saying to hurry up and come see her NOW! This escort is also slender and pretty, younger than the other girl. This one is 22 and the other was young 30's. This girl also did this many times and it was no big to do for her.

I followed her lead. I arrived at her hotel room. We made small talk for about 10 minutes and she said, I don't mean to be rude, but I can't hold it in any longer. I NEED to shit on you NOW!. She laid a bath towel down on the floor and instructed me to lay down on it. She perched her ass towards my neck as i looked at her asshole. Like rapid fire, 10 to 15 hard little shit balls flew out of her asshole!!:) They weren't as smelly as the previous girls. These were hard little shit balls that lacked moisture. i guess that is why they
did not smell as much. I collected her shit balls and saved them in an empty peanut butter jar. :) She feels a closer bonding to me and me to her.

To a girl who has shit on guys before, it is no big deal. It is just a matter of swapping phone #'s and being ready to go see her when she calls you and says she has to shit now!

I paid the regular session fee to each girl. the first one was $200 and the second one $150. I have had at least 100 different girls pee in my mouth, face and chest. A girl shitting on you is similar, but kinkier. I wouldn't eat shit, but there is a turn on via having a slender and pretty girl shit on you. Perhaps because you know it is something that is not a very common activity.

Psychedelic